And the earth did not swallow him

The other day in open court (in this state, almost all juvenile hearings are in open court), once my kid's mother finished explaining that it was a cultural thing for her teenager to carry a weapon (a big scary brass knuckles thing, with a serrated blade facing out and two more blades that flipped out to the sides), my dear client said, "your Honor, if I'd meant to use it, I assure you that someone would've been hurt bad."

I stared down at the floor, hoping for a sudden earthquake to open up a chasm for me to jump into and hide.